Tuesday, April 14, 2009
♥ Sigh.. x.x
*pats bloggie* How have you been ? It's like 6am now and i'm supposed to be sleeping now actually, but i can't fall asleep. Hell i hate this lifestyle of mine. I'm not sleeping when i'm ought to. Thus the result of those awful dark eye rings i have under my eyes. Anyways i don't give a damn because i'm ugly enough so bleh. ._.
Work was getting really boring. But i have no other choice. Who's going to support the family if i don't work? Damn i'm getting tired of it really. So i made up my mind i'll be going to seoul by end of this year whether or not my family approves or not. I'm old enough to make my own decisions and since i don't have that much time left, i felt i should do something meaningful and being independent in a brand new atmosphere is just what i need. Seoul i'm coming!! .. Saving hard now.. Barely spending any money on any unnecessary stuffs i guess i'll be able to make it. =D
Time reallly flies huh. It's gonna be thursday again and there's gonna be another audition outing coming up. Will be meeting up Leen, Ades and some other clan members. Oh well, i guess i'll kind of look forward to thursday then. Been grinding Rappelz for these few days while working and finally i'm at R3.. ._. .. it's kind of an accomplishment for me lol cause i've never thought that i'll make it this far. Anyway, theres still a long road to go before r4 so.. gambatte kudasai!
Alright i ought to be sleeping. My skin's condition really worsen due to lack of sleep. Arghh.. I gotta make things right. Luk's been sick for quite some time now and nic's stop working at night due to the fact that school has reopened for him and he's started schooling. I'm actually happy for him because i believed that it's never too old to learn new things so do well nic! Oh well, Junie's been taking over he's shift and hmm.. It's kinda weird but i guess i'll get use to it. Just hope that luk will get well soon. It's weird not seeing him when i arrive for work lol..
As for shawn, i didn't hear from him anymore. I guess he thinks that he's not needed anymore.. And i know any more stuffs i say will definately make things worse. So i'll just let nature takes its own course. Though i'm not really use to it but i guess i'll get over it pretty soon .. i dunno .. that's just what i thought.
Abrupt pains kept haunting me and it's definately turning my life upside down. Next week's gonna be a full body check up day again .. I don't know why but i can't help feeling that i'm being cursed.. Perhaps i really asked for it. But i believed that it's not good cursing someone even he's really mean. I mean Karma exists in this world, so .. well uh .. ._.
alright i'm heading to bed. Good night bloggie. Guess i'll talk to you another day.
Work was getting really boring. But i have no other choice. Who's going to support the family if i don't work? Damn i'm getting tired of it really. So i made up my mind i'll be going to seoul by end of this year whether or not my family approves or not. I'm old enough to make my own decisions and since i don't have that much time left, i felt i should do something meaningful and being independent in a brand new atmosphere is just what i need. Seoul i'm coming!! .. Saving hard now.. Barely spending any money on any unnecessary stuffs i guess i'll be able to make it. =D
Time reallly flies huh. It's gonna be thursday again and there's gonna be another audition outing coming up. Will be meeting up Leen, Ades and some other clan members. Oh well, i guess i'll kind of look forward to thursday then. Been grinding Rappelz for these few days while working and finally i'm at R3.. ._. .. it's kind of an accomplishment for me lol cause i've never thought that i'll make it this far. Anyway, theres still a long road to go before r4 so.. gambatte kudasai!
Alright i ought to be sleeping. My skin's condition really worsen due to lack of sleep. Arghh.. I gotta make things right. Luk's been sick for quite some time now and nic's stop working at night due to the fact that school has reopened for him and he's started schooling. I'm actually happy for him because i believed that it's never too old to learn new things so do well nic! Oh well, Junie's been taking over he's shift and hmm.. It's kinda weird but i guess i'll get use to it. Just hope that luk will get well soon. It's weird not seeing him when i arrive for work lol..
As for shawn, i didn't hear from him anymore. I guess he thinks that he's not needed anymore.. And i know any more stuffs i say will definately make things worse. So i'll just let nature takes its own course. Though i'm not really use to it but i guess i'll get over it pretty soon .. i dunno .. that's just what i thought.
Abrupt pains kept haunting me and it's definately turning my life upside down. Next week's gonna be a full body check up day again .. I don't know why but i can't help feeling that i'm being cursed.. Perhaps i really asked for it. But i believed that it's not good cursing someone even he's really mean. I mean Karma exists in this world, so .. well uh .. ._.
alright i'm heading to bed. Good night bloggie. Guess i'll talk to you another day.
What? What is it that i want?
You ask me?
Perhaps your asking the wrong person.
Because i don't even know myself.
Who i am anymore. How i think
How i act, how i feel.
all this, i don't even know.
Completely Blank, completed dried up.
Thats what happened to my pool of emotions.
I guess its better this way.
Without having any feelings for anything,
I guess thats the best way a cowardly one like me would choose to live.
You might think i'm stupid, insulting and invading my privacy where my deepest thoughts hold.
But you know what?
It doesn't affect me anymore, Not anymore.
For i've chosen to abandon this very land soon.
To some where new, To some where fresh
To start anew.
Though its gonna be short,
But at least, I've accomplished one of my goals.
And i'm contented enough.
You ask me?
Perhaps your asking the wrong person.
Because i don't even know myself.
Who i am anymore. How i think
How i act, how i feel.
all this, i don't even know.
Completely Blank, completed dried up.
Thats what happened to my pool of emotions.
I guess its better this way.
Without having any feelings for anything,
I guess thats the best way a cowardly one like me would choose to live.
You might think i'm stupid, insulting and invading my privacy where my deepest thoughts hold.
But you know what?
It doesn't affect me anymore, Not anymore.
For i've chosen to abandon this very land soon.
To some where new, To some where fresh
To start anew.
Though its gonna be short,
But at least, I've accomplished one of my goals.
And i'm contented enough.
6:02:00 AM
